Arizona

I would apologize for the lack of posts in the last few weeks but really, if there was ever a good reason to drop the ball, this would be it.

A few weeks ago Blair applied for a job as the Audio Engineer for Christ's Church of the Valley, a large church in Phoenix, Arizona.  Within two weeks a preliminary phone interview was scheduled, a Skype interview was had and Blair and I were flown out to meet the staff and see the church.  Needless to say, we were living in a state of disbelief at the quick succession of events, excited and a bit in denial about what this might mean for our family.

We scheduled our visit during the first weekend of our planned trip down to Cape May and Nags Head with our families.  Ava spent four days by herself at Mimi and Pappy's while Grayson, Blair and I hopped on a plane headed for Phoenix and it's 107 degree weather.  Honestly, the preparations happened so quickly it didn't really hit me what was happening until we were in the air, crossing over states I have never seen by foot, my daughter hundreds of miles away and my son screaming for a captive audience.  As we neared our destination, I got to see the plains of the midwest turn into desert and then beautiful, cracked mountains.  I watched the sun set and the dark deserted landscape turn into a vibrant city, lit, bustling and new.  I felt God begin to stir in my heart as I looked out and wondered if this could be home.

Then it hit.  The wall of heat.  We left the airport and it was as if someone had opened an oven in front of me that followed me wherever I went.  Walking to find the shuttle that would take us to our rental car was enough to warrant an extra bottle of water and a nap.

The next morning I awoke exhausted, Grayson had been awake for the day at 3:30am (since there is a 3 hour time difference) and we had a full day ahead.  I prayed for strength and that God would help me to be present for this impending whirlwind of a weekend, despite the tiredness, overwhelmedness and presence of a 5 month old who would be spending 99% of the time in his car seat and be dragged around in what feels to be the middle of the night.

That first day we met many of the staff and staff wives, visited the church for the first time and I got to spend a lot of time there while Blair was working.  It was overwhelming to say the least but not in the way I expected.  I hated the dry, dirt and brown of the city but the church was an oasis.  The campus was beautiful, inviting and I could easily see myself, my family, finding a home there.  That was overwhelming.  I thought, God, I have had an anxious sickness in my belly all day, driving on roads I don't know, past buildings and streets that I don't recognize, surrounded by people who don't know me.    I don't think I want to like it here.  I didn't realize how comfortable I had gotten in State College until I pictured myself in this alien city and felt that loss of familiarity and home.  I fought tears for much of the day but I felt God whispering in my heart, "Let go of what is comfortable because you aren't growing there.  I have plans for you here."  Stirring excitement intermingled with dread.

Every person we met made Blair and I feel so welcome, loved our son, asked about Ava and took time to get to know us.  In two days I felt we really could have friends there.  Blair and I left feeling like all of our expectations about the church, the job and the people were exceeded.  Exceeded.  That's hard to do when your standards for what would be worth moving across the country for are so high.  We came away feeling already invested in this place and feeling God's presence and movement there.

After a plane flight home on Monday and a wash and repack of four people's things, we left Tuesday morning for the first of our two vacations.  It was only by God's great planning that we'd be spending that time with so many of our extended family prior to a potential move.  We took it all in, and then on Friday, Blair was officially offered the position.

We told Ava first.  We were reeling at the decision and it's implications but explaining it to her centered us and united us as a family.

 "Will Nana and Papa be there?"

 "No, they will stay at their house and our new house will be pretty far away."

 "Will I be far away from Erin and Jon and Brayden and my best friend Ruthie?"  We marveled at her immediate insight into the part of this move that we were most worried about for her.

 "Yes, but we can still visit sometimes and talk on the computer with them."

 "Okay."

 "Ava, how do you feel about moving into a new house in a new place and leaving your room at home?"

 "Sad."

 "Did you know that we can take all of your things with us, even your furniture and your butterfly mobile?"

 Eyes lit up.  "We can?!  Even my butterflies can come?!"

 "Will there be new stuffed animal friends waiting for me when we get to the new house?!"

 "Uh, I think we can safely say YES, I'm sure there will be." :)

She was not thrilled when we told her that she would be taking an airplane ride to Arizona but after we showed her pictures of our flight she was sold.  To see the clouds from up above?  I'm there.

Fear of plane flight averted.

We showed her pictures of the church's beautiful campus, the kids building and the grassy area filled with balls and hoola hoops.  She was smitten.  We are expecting the move to be difficult for all of us but for now God has blessed us with relative ease.  Ava so easily goes with the flow that I think she will do pretty well until it's time to leave her by herself at sunday school or preschool.  One day at a time.

Since returning home from our vacations we have been faced with the reality of our next four weeks at home.  I packed the first boxes yesterday and my thoughts are filled with finding new doctors, transferring prescriptions and adjusting the kids schedules so the time change won't hit us all like a ton of bricks when we get there.  It is surreal, to say the least, but we are so thankful.

God's leading and presence in these last few weeks has been palpable.  The last couple of months have been some of the most difficult for me since we had kids but I have felt God caring for me even in this. The intricate ways that He prepared us, both Blair professionally and personally in his talents, desires and work, and for me, emotionally, stripping me down to a readiness to follow Him in His strength and not my own.  God has made a way for us to go, worked out details of finances, car buying, finding a preschool for Ava.  The list is endless.  We are so grateful for this opportunity and so in awe of how God intimately wove this into happening.

And in mid-September we go.  To a place where they have yards of rocks instead of grass.  To a city where God is working.