A little history and how I survived the tummy bug

I have a stomach virus phobia. Many people do but I really REALLY do. Most of you know, shortly after Blair and I got married in 2006, I started getting sick with one thing after another, and after suffering two stomach viruses within a couple weeks of each other, I was hospitalized and never got better. Fatigue, pain, nausea, migraines, blurred vision, muscle weakness, brain fog... I had every vague but insufferable symptom in the book. I saw maybe ten different specialists with as many diagnoses and no end in sight. Needless to say, there began my hatred of stomach viruses and how they, without warning or permission, catapulted me and my life in a frightening and grim direction.

When Blair and I began talking to my many doctor's about starting a family, they basically told us not to wait for me to get better--I might never recover. So we decided to step out in faith and get pregnant. Every doctor said that I would probably feel better while I was pregnant and get a lot worse after the birth. I was terrified of this scenario, having to care for a baby when I could barely care for myself some days, but we decided to go forward anyway and not let this keep us from having kids.

Turns out, I felt horrible pregnant. But, from the moment I went into labor, my body did what it was supposed to do, I was able to muster the energy to push Ava out (my obstetrician was afraid I wouldn't be able to do even that), and have been healthy every day since. No doctor could see it coming or explain it. We call it a miracle.

With this newfound health, I still haven't let go of my intense fear of getting a stomach virus and the anxiety of whether or not I could get really sick again. It has gotten easier to handle over time but I still have to fight off panic at the mere mention of a friend with an upset stomach. With that, the idea of Ava getting her first tummy bug terrified me quite a bit.

But, this week we did it. Right on the heels of an ear infection and that horrible fever, Ava had her first stomach virus. Blair wasn't home and so I bore it alone, the cleanup, the crying, the fever, the first few hours of sleeplessness until Blair got home from work. It was awful but at the same time, it feels so good to have it over with. To have faced my fear, kept my spirits up for my baby's sake, dealt with the anxiety and pushed through it.

Thankfully, I have yet to catch this awful bug and give all the glory to God for that. I still am afraid of the first time I have to go through that again, but to have this behind me and to know that I survived is a great victory for me. As for Ava, she unfortunately had a horrible cold at the same time so is dealing with the effects of that but the traumatic night of the tummy bug is no doubt far behind her. I am so grateful for the resilience of children! And thankful for my baby girl for not only curing me with her entrance into the world but continuing to be a source for my own growth and refinement, my dependence on the Lord, and the realization of my own strength.